Sanctimonious assholes piss me off

Why the hell can't people just mind their own business?

My friend Hope just got married on Sunday. It was a complete shock to me, as she and I haven't talked in a while. I knew that she was dating someone and that she would probably marry the guy, but the surprise nature of it really caught me off guard. I am really happy for her and her husband Paul, as they're both great people who deserve many blessings and happiness.

Hope and Paul happen to be pretty devout Catholics, and it's obvious to anyone who knows them that they credit God for bringing them together. The thing is that while both of them are divorced from previous marriages, Paul's first marriage hasn't been officially annulled yet, which is generally a requirement in order to get married in the Catholic church, complete with a church wedding and all that jazz. Honestly, annulments are incredibly easy to get in the United States (maybe too easy...Grace calls them "McNulments" and she's right). Members of my own family have received them, and while the process takes a little time, it's pretty much a given that the annulment will be granted. If a couple chooses to have a ceremony outside of the church (as Hope and Paul did), they always have the option of getting their marriage convalidated by the Catholic church once the annulment is finalized (granted, not always the case, but the overwhelming majority of the time it is the case). Once the marriage is convalidated, it's as if they had a church wedding from the very beginning, "endorsed" and "blessed" by the church. This is much more common than people realize, and it does not in any way make a couple "less Catholic" if they choose this route.

Anyway, some uber-Catholic bozo posted a status update on her Facebook page which was clearly a not-so-veiled attack on Hope and Paul (although this woman claims ignorance, I know she's full of shit because Hope is on both her and my friends list, which means she saw Hope's news). The bozo's status update said something like this (paraphrasing): "I will never understand why two practicing Catholics choose to forego a church wedding in front of a priest for a civil ceremony, rather than waiting for the annulments to be finalized. Couldn't they have waited to have a real wedding/marriage in the eyes of God?"

Um, excuse me?

First of all, I know that Hope and Paul are going to have their marriage convalidated as soon as possible, so it's really not a huge deal with regard to their marriage eventually being "endorsed" by the church.

Second, even if they weren't going to have it convalidated, does that mean that God hasn't blessed their marriage? If one believes what God/Jesus said about always being with us, then doesn't it stand to reason that God/Jesus would bless all the events of our lives (with the possible exception of committing very heinous crimes such as murder)?

I understand that the Catholic religion requires annulments and, eventually, convalidation of the marriage. I have no problem with that, because that's the way the religion is set up (I also have no problem with those religions that do not require annulments or convalidation, as it's the way those religions are set up). Even though I haven't got a problem with the way that the Catholic church handles this matter as an institutional policy, the fact remains that the majority of people in this world are not Catholic. Does that mean that their marriages haven't been blessed by God? I don't think so. Similarly, let's say that you had a Catholic wedding in the United States and then moved to Iran. Does the fact that the Muslim religion would not "bless" your marriage mean that it's any less blessed or holy in the eyes of God? Again, I don't think so.

Third, the fact is that Hope and Paul's wedding is legal in the eyes of society. Because we in the United States do not live in a theocracy (thank God), their marriage is just as legal as if it had been "witnessed" by a priest, minister, rabbi, or any other member of the clergy. To imply that their marriage is somehow "not real" is hypocritical and a slap in the face.

As an aside, I know that a legal marriage in the United States doesn't automatically include any religious aspect. But knowing that two people feel that God brought them together and that these two people are pretty devout in practicing their religion seems to say that God is right there in the middle.

Finally...and this is the big one for me...who the hell are we to say what God can or cannot do? I don't believe that God has an "anything goes" mentality, but I do believe that God is very loving, and that he would be utterly thrilled for Hope and Paul or any other couple in the same situation. The fact is that we don't understand God very well, and we probably won't until it's all explained to us at the end of time (my personal belief). How do we know why God does the things he does? How do we know that God doesn't bless two lovely and decent people who decide to make a lifetime commitment to one another? Another fact is that we simply have no control over what God does, feels, or thinks. Unless I see clear evidence to the contrary, I choose to believe that God will bless any marriage that is undertaken for the right reasons and with the right aims. He may also want the official requirements of a couple's particular religion to be fulfilled (no problem there), but that doesn't mean that the marriage isn't blessed.

As far as I'm concerned, I want God's blessing if I ever get married...hell, I'll need God's blessing! Marriage is tough enough as it is, so having a little divine guidance should definitely help matters.

I'm not knocking religion here. In fact, I think that religion, practiced and used in the spirit of God's love and kindness and forgiveness, is a great thing. I think it's important to have a belief in something greater than ourselves, and religion is often an excellent way to help manifest that belief. I also believe that people who have some sort of religious affiliation are generally happier and more fulfilled in life...studies and my own personal observations have shown this. The same goes for couples who have a religious affiliation (even if they're from different religious traditions, although that can admittedly become thorny at times). Couples with a religious affiliation tend to be happier and last longer than those without one. I'm not pulling that out of my ass to endorse religious affiliation, but just simply stating what many studies have shown. None of this is to say that a couple without a strong religious belief or affiliation can't last...many can and do, even if they have no religion. I just believe that it's easier with a religious affiliation, and studies back me up on this.

Although I'm not knocking religion, I am knocking the "holier than thou" types who automatically condemn something that is outside their perception of their religious tradition. It's fine for these people to have the beliefs they do (as fucked up as I can sometimes think they are). However, it's not fine to start publicly exclaiming that a marriage is somehow "not real" or not blessed by God when it's not our call to make.

My life was changed on Friday night.

I found out a few weeks ago that my sister is pregnant with her first child...and that means I'm gonna be an uncle for the first time! I am very excited about this, and I can't wait to be an uncle and have a nephew! All of the fun and none (or almost none) of the responsibility! ;)

How was my life changed on Friday night, you ask? I saw a DVD of my sister's latest fetal sonogram (her son is due in May). So much could be seen! I saw facial and limb features, vertebrae, brain hemispheres, and even the four heart chambers. It was the best thing I have ever seen! So cool!

As an aside...I'm now firmly convinced that abortion is not a political issue. I know that it's a life issue. I wish everyone could experience a feeling like I did when I saw that sonogram on Friday night. If one is morally and intellectually honest with themselves, I don't see how there's any way that someone could justify abortion except in the most extreme circumstances (read: the mother's life is in danger). The little boy growing inside my sister's belly is not a "potential" life...it is a life! Regardless of one's political or religious persuasion, seeing something like that sonogram makes this an indisputable fact. I wish that the media, the public, and the politicians would stop being so damn polarized over this issue (as evidenced by their actions and words). I wish that they would all see this for what it is...the miracle of life!

Again, abortion is not a political issue, nor is it a "choice" or "freedom" issue. Quite simply, it's a life issue...and in the end, that is the only thing that needs to be acknowledged in this "debate." I am neither Democrat nor Republican, and while my politics tend to lean conservative in many areas, I'm not "hard core" on most things. This is an exception, though. After what I saw on Friday night, I don't see how it couldn't be.

I believe I am forever changed by what I saw on Friday night. This doesn't mean I'm going to become a right wing nut job who spews out hatred and/or violence toward those who disagree with me about abortion. As far as I'm concerned, that's just as wrong as the left wing nut jobs who spew out hatred and/or violence toward those who disagree with, for example, the expansion of government in our society. What this does mean for me is that I am more grateful for my life, my friends, my family, and my God. All of them have played a part in making me who I am today and in showing me that even when life sucks, it's still a beautiful thing.

Let me end this post with a video I saw on YouTube. It's set to one of my favorite songs by George Strait called "I Saw God Today." The song is told from the point of view of a man whose wife has just given birth to their child (in the song it's a daughter). While this is a main theme of the song, it's also about noticing the little things in life and appreciating life for the wonderful things that it can bring us. Enjoy the song and the video!

"Desiderata" -- one of my favorite poems.

"Desiderata"

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Max Ehrmann, "Desiderata", Copyright 1952.

These are people who give religion a bad name.

I'll just post the link to the web page so you can read it for yourself. Short synopsis: some church in North Carolina is planning a "book burning" for what they consider to be "evil or satanic" books and music. Even the Bible itself is being burned, if it's not the "King James Version." Other authors whose "evil" books are being burned are Rick Warren ("The Purpose Driven Life"), Billy Graham, and Mother Teresa.

By no means am I suggesting that organized religion is bad on its face. In fact, I think it's a good thing for most people, and I know more happy people who belong to a religion than I do people who don't belong to a religion. I also think that not respecting others' beliefs (even if you don't agree with them), as well as doing bad things "in the name of God" are directly counter to the message that is inherent in many religions...Christianity, Hinduism, Judaism, and a host of others. Even though I believe that having a spiritual home is a good thing, one doesn't need to be perfect at their religion, or even profess a religion, in order to be a good person.

Anyway...underneath the video, read the lyrics to a song called "Good Man" by one of my favorite musicians, David Wilcox. He hits it right on the head about the hypocrisy and bad name given to innocent people when terrible acts are done "in the name of God." I'll have more to say about that in another blog post later today or tomorrow, but for now, take a look at this link, read the story, watch the video, and read those lyrics (and if you want to listen to the song, go to David Wilcox's website here and go to song #102...and there are lots of other great songs on there for your listening pleasure that'll cure what ails ya!).

**PS to Maryann: Have you listened to the rest of that David Wilcox CD I gave you? No? Then DO IT! LOL! Listen to track 9 ("To Love") and you'll really get a sense of my feelings on things. I think you will love that song! :)

What a change of perspective great news can bring!

I'm going out on a limb here that people I know won't stumble upon this blog and blurt this out to people whom we may mutually know. If anyone I know does see this, please keep it to yourself for another week or so.

I found out today that I'm going to be an uncle for the first time. Not an "honorary uncle" to my friends' kids (all of whom I love dearly). A real, genuine uncle! Wow! This is something I've wanted for probably at least 8 years! I never told my sister about that wish (until an email that I just sent her), because I thought it wasn't any of my business when she decided to have a kid...and I can't control it, anyway. Still, I've wanted this day to come for a long time, and I know I'd rather be an uncle than a father (at least at this point in my life).

So how do I feel about it? Does "over the moon" sound too strong? It doesn't feel that way for me! In addition to my long-held wish to be an uncle, I know that my sister and brother-in-law, being the wonderful people that they are, will make fantastic parents! Although I wasn't totally sure that my sister really wanted a kid, I definitely know the answer now! I couldn't be happier for her and her husband. I know that their child (don't know the sex yet) will be raised in a home full of love, life, and happiness. There will be discipline, too, when needed. But as a good friend of mine says, "discipline means love." As much as I can get that without being a parent myself, I think I understand that a little better today. I'm sure I'll understand it even better when my sister gives birth. No matter what, though, I know that their child will never want for love or security.

This also gives me hope. For so long it's seemed to me like the good people were always the ones who got screwed (well, maybe not always, but surely more than was necessary). It shows me that maybe God does want good things to happen to good people. Hell, even if God had nothing to do with it, the fact that a great thing has happened to two great people makes me smile and lifts my spirits.

On a selfish note, this is easily the best news I've heard in months! It's been a really crappy few months for me lately, primarily due to medical issues that haven't seemed to let up. My sister's pregnancy changes my perspective on it all, though...big time! Sure, I've gone through hell in some ways, but haven't we all? Even though I've been through a lot, and even though I've felt like quitting a few times, today makes it all worth it. As that old Garth Brooks song goes, "I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance." How true that seems to me now!

Speaking of songs, I know one that I'm definitely playing for my sister and brother-in-law after their child is born. Check out "I Saw God Today" by George Strait. It gets me whenever I hear it, and I think it will be even more meaningful when my new niece or nephew is born.

I was a little miffed at my sister earlier for a comment she made when she and I and my father and his wife had lunch Saturday. I was going to send her an email about it. While I don't like to feel condescended to as her comment made me feel, it doesn't really matter today. As I mentioned earlier, I sent an email to my sister. Nowhere in it was anything about any gripes I have with her. It doesn't matter today. All I know is that my sister is very happy, and for that, so am I.

God, please bless my sister and brother-in-law, and please bless my future niece or nephew. :)

Back from my trip to Mars for some rants, raves, thanks, and praises

I'm baaack! What's up? Last time I posted, I think Ronald Reagan was still President! ;) Seriously, it's been way too long, and I do feel like I've taken a trip to Mars since I last posted. It's not like I've not had anything to say...I've just not been saying it here. I need to start posting more...once a week, or more if the mood strikes. I'm sure my friends would appreciate it so I don't bug them as much. LOL!

I'm going to try not to say a lot here, and I'm not posting any links to stuff I might rant about (I trust you'll already know the stories or be motivated to look things up yourself). I do want to touch on a variety of subjects, though, and they'll be broken down by topic. They're not necessarily in order of importance to me, with the notable exception of the first two. Here goes.

Friendship: I believe that you learn who your true friends are when you go through adversity. While I realize that my troubles are nothing compared to those of many people in this world, I've been through an awful lot over the last few months, both physically and emotionally. While there have been many people who have been incredibly supportive over the last few months, there's one person without whom I really don't think I would have made it through intact. That's my friend Maryann. Even though we unfortunately live too far apart, she's been there for me more than anyone else...to listen to me, to encourage me, to make me laugh, to bolster my spirits, to help keep my mind active, to keep me from getting too far down in an emotional hole, and to gently kick my butt when I've needed it. While she's not always agreed with all I've said or with the way I've handled everything (and I don't blame her), she's never judged me to be a bad person, nor an irreparable person. Nor has she ever said or implied that I'm anything other than a flawed but decent man, and a great friend. I know that friends are supposed to help each other through the tough times and show compassion, and those are some of Maryann's greatest qualities...she genuinely tries to help, and it's obvious that her love and concern and compassion are genuine as well. I wish there were more people like her in this world.

Maryann, THANK YOU for all that you are and for all that you do. Thanks for giving me hope to keep on fighting when I thought I had no hope left. I appreciate it more than you know. These things and the things I mentioned above are only some of the reasons why you're my best friend, and why I thank God for you. I promise you that I'll return the favor and then some whenever you need me, in good times or in bad times...even at 3 am. You're one of the best people I know in more ways than you know. Please don't forget that you're wonderful. I love you! :)

God and religion: A friend and I were kicking this idea around last weekend...perhaps the reason that God made different faiths and different beliefs, many with which we might not agree, is because he wanted to teach us how to tolerate and love one another despite our differences. I like this idea!

President Obama winning the Nobel Peace Prize: Why? What has he done to deserve this? I'm not saying he won't do anything to deserve it in the future. I am saying that he hasn't done jack shit yet. Given that he had been in office a whole 12 days when the ballots were due, it's clear to me that this decision was purely political. I think the Nobel committee wanted to send a message that they didn't care for the policies of the George W. Bush administration (fine, but this is not the venue in which to send that message), and I also think that this decision was part of the near deification of President Obama that is still rampant in certain circles (especially the media). I don't really like the majority of things he's done so far, but I'm willing to admit the possibility that he may end up a decent President. Even if he ends up being the best President we've ever had, let's be sure to give him accolades that he actually deserves.

Divisiveness and partisanship: I think that this is the biggest problem our country faces at the moment. Bigger than Iraq or Afghanistan. Bigger than North Korea. Bigger than health care. Bigger than the economy. It's perfectly OK (and expected) for people to disagree on things and to vent their disagreement. But there's a right way to do that and a wrong way to do that. The vitriol that has been coming out of opposite camps on all sorts of issues, from health care reform to the economic stimuli to government takeovers of corporations to any other number of things, has been extraordinarily detrimental to the ideas of free speech and American-style democracy itself, not to mention the concept of actually solving any of the serious problems that befall our country. Most people think I'm nuts when I say this, but I think that unless we find ways to disagree without tearing each other down, and unless we find ways to work together to solve our country's problems despite any disagreements, divisiveness, or partisanship we may have, then the USA as we know it will cease to exist...probably within the next 20-25 years. I think that Americans are already fighting a philosophical and ideological civil war. I pray that we as a country wake up before it becomes a Civil War where blood is spilled. I try to remain hopeful that it won't come to that, but I really have my doubts some days. Although I don't think he was a great President in many ways, Richard Nixon was right on the money when he said this..."We cannot learn from one another until we stop shouting at one another - until we speak quietly enough so that our words can be heard as well as our voices." This certainly applies today.

A few weeks ago, I saw a bumper sticker that read "God is not a Republican...or a Democrat." If we want God to help us to protect this nation in whatever way God or we are able to do so, then the rancor and hatred, whether motivated by political partisanship or simple divisiveness, needs to stop...NOW. Our country's future depends on it.

Music: Although I don't yet have all of the remastered Beatles CDs, I want them all! "Revolver" and "Abbey Road" sound amazing! I want that "Beatles in Mono" box set, too! Something to put on the Christmas list! ;) On another note, Ben Folds sounds friggin' amazing live with the Dallas Symphony Orchestra! One of the best concerts I've been to, maybe ever. I still think it's funny that over 2,000 people were yelling "Fuck!" at the top of their lungs in one of the world's greatest and most opulent symphony halls!

Health care: Sort of related to my rant on divisiveness and partisanship. I think that the Democrats are full of it and delusional if they really expect that "universal health care" is going to solve the health insurance crisis. Similarly, I think that the Republicans are full of it and delusional if they really think that the system is generally fine as is and doesn't need significant change.

Let's first take on a fundamental question that many politicians -- Democrat, Republican, or Independent -- seem to have forgotten about: HOW WILL WE PAY FOR THIS? Yes, we need reform, but can we afford to grow our national debt even more into the trillions of dollars to implement all that the President and many politicians (mostly Democrats, let's face it) want to implement? I think the answer is obvious...we can't afford it. Small businesses can't afford it, either. If they're FORCED to provide health insurance for all of their employees no matter the cost, then many of these small businesses will shut their doors, plain and simple. I've seen it happen already with the way that health care costs have risen dramatically in the last 15 years or so. Similarly, can the consumer who will be FORCED to buy insurance under the government's program afford it, even with subsidies? Again, I'd say that the answer is no, at least in some cases. The person who will be forced into the government's plan or a private insurance plan is, most likely, going to be one who does not have group health insurance coverage through their employer. Given that I've had to pay for COBRA once in my life (which is not too much different from buying your own private policy outright), I know that the costs can be astronomical. I paid over $300 per month when I was on COBRA after losing a job...this was many years ago, and it was just for myself. Clearly, unless premiums (both on private plans and any government plan that comes into being) are kept at a reasonable level, the end result will be that there will be MORE people who will have economic hardship, not fewer, if they're forced to buy insurance. Similarly, the costs need to be kept down for the companies themselves. As much as you and I might pay for health insurance through our employers, I guarantee you that our employers pay much more...in fact, employers usually subsidize at least 65 to 70 percent of the true cost for their employees' health insurance. 

Why are the costs so high to companies and individuals? My opinion is that it's greed on the part of the insurance companies. Sure, they have a right and a responsibility to make a profit. What they don't have the right to do is to price gouge companies and individuals. While the insurance companies (nor the drug companies for that matter) won't admit this, they are a major part of the reason why health care costs have skyrocketed. Because the insurance companies' monetary payouts to doctors are a joke, doctors have been forced to raise their fees in order to remain competitive in business. Don't believe me? Try to pay for something when you don't have insurance or when it's not covered by your insurance. Many years ago, doctors (and hospitals) were much more willing to negotiate with patients on the final cost of services, or on the length of time that a patient has to pay their balance. Some of those doctors still exist, but they are becoming increasingly rarer to find. Because the insurance companies have the doctors over a barrel if the doctors want to be a part of a particular insurance company's "panel", the doctors have no choice but to raise their overall fees in order to make up for the pathetic payments they get from the insurance companies, thus screwing people who don't have insurance or whose insurance doesn't cover a particular procedure or diagnosis. Trust me on this...I used to work for a major health insurance company, and I know a bit about how it works.

Although I think that the Democrats are largely misguided on what they want to accomplish, I do applaud them (and President Obama) for one particular thing...their desire to end denials for pre-existing conditions. While there are some state laws that prohibit these kinds of denials in certain situations and for certain types of products (ex: HMOs in Texas), denials for pre-existing need to go away altogether. They don't make sense for an individual or family who desperately need(s) health insurance, and they don't make sense in the long run for business, either. This is just an example of extreme cost-cutting run amok. It's not just on the part of the insurance companies, either. Many group health plans are simply administered by an insurance company such as Blue Cross/Blue Shield or Aetna (where I worked, this type of plan was called "ASO", or "Administrative Services Only"). The actual spending of the money -- and the decisions on what is covered or not covered (pre-existing or otherwise) -- are often spent or made (respectively) by the employers themselves. This happens more often than most people realize. While I'm not making excuses for the insurance companies, lots of times they're just doing what they've been told to do and what they're being paid to do by a company. 

Regarding those who say that we don't need reform or that we only need minute "tweaks" in the system (like most Republicans), I pose a few simple questions. What do we, as a nation, do when there are people who are getting unnecessarily financially squeezed by the insurance companies and government? What happens to their freedom of choice? Where will their incentive or ability to spend or invest in other sectors of the economy come from when they don't have the money to pay for their health care costs? Sure, there are those who squander their money or who intentionally try to bilk health care providers out of money owed. But I submit that those people are the exception, not the rule. Similarly, what do we do when someone is denied treatment for something which would be reasonably simple and inexpensive to treat at that point, but becomes increasingly more difficult and expensive to treat as time goes on? As an example, take someone who is denied insurance payment for some outpatient mental health services they may need. Yes, those services can be expensive. But are they more expensive than inpatient mental health services....services which could possibly have been avoided had the insurance company just agreed to cover the outpatient services in the first place? Clearly not. And it's not just more expensive monetarily. The cost to society from lost work and productivity, as well as the overall health and happiness of the patient, can't be underestimated. These kinds of denials don't just happen with the big private health insurance companies...Medicare and Medicaid (both government run) deny things, too. They're just too bureaucratic and slow to do things before the general public notices (or before the media reports on them). Because of this, I think we have to be careful with any government run health care reform that may come down the pike. 

Is having health insurance a "right" in this country? I say no. It's often a necessity (largely due to the costs of treatment), but it's not a right. After all, you can still get treatment in an ER or in many public or "charity based" hospitals even if you don't have health insurance. Having said that, is the actual health care of our country's citizens a "right"? I say yes to that one. I think that living in a reasonably free society such as ours, people have a right to expect that their medical ailments will be treated in some fashion. This goes for people who have insurance and for those who don't...even if those who don't have it have chosen to forgo health insurance voluntarily.
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I could write a lot more, but I've gone on WAY too long already. I intended this post to be reasonably pithy. So much for that! LOL! I really need an editor! I'll be back soon to share more thoughts on whatever random crap is going through my head, whether it's as important as health care reform or as unimportant (by comparison) as the latest remastered CD by a legendary band.

Thanks for reading and for staying with me here! You've earned a medal! I welcome any comments, agreements, disagreements, or rants about what I've said here. :)

Happy Easter!

It's late in the evening as I write this. I'm not really up to writing a overly long treatise tonight (imagine that!), but I just wanted to post a few thoughts about Easter.

As I intimated in my previous post, thinking that anyone, much less Jesus himself, would give their life for me is awe-inspiring and incredibly humbling. I watched a little bit of a program on the History Channel earlier today that dealt with crucifixion in general...how it's done, how it can affect the body, and how it ultimately causes death. While I was watching it, I had it in my head that this was probably what Jesus was actually observing, feeling...and living...during those moments when he was being scourged and then nailed to the cross. I struggled to keep my emotions in check at that moment, because if what I saw on the History Channel program is anything close to how it actually happened, then I know that Jesus suffered more than I can possibly imagine. This was eye-opening and very moving to me.

And yet, despite what must have been a gruesome and excruciatingly painful death, Jesus was resurrected. He lives again! What a confusing time that must have been for all of his disciples and those who loved him. They knew he was crucified, and then when they went to his tomb a few days later he was gone. Of course they thought that his body was stolen...as would just about anyone, I'd guess. But then Jesus appeared, just like he said he would. He still bore the wounds of the stigmata, but he was alive! And he still lives today! If that is not a reason for hope and thankfulness, then I don't know what is.

I am profoundly grateful for what Jesus has done for me, and I hope to remain forever grateful. I also hope to remain optimistic, knowing that if Jesus can conquer death, then with his help, there are no trials that I cannot withstand. How amazing!

Maybe you agree with what I've said here, or maybe you agree with some of my religious views (I will probably detail them further in future posts). Maybe you don't agree with my words or with my beliefs. It's ok if you don't...I am not one to judge. I am a very tolerant man and I try to learn something from all people and viewpoints, even those with which I don't agree. Whether or not you agree, I want to take this moment to say a few quick things...we can overcome even the most harrowing of circumstances, but we can't do it alone. For me, I need the help of family, friends, and God. For you it may be different. Either way, we need each other as people, and I believe that we need to have faith in something greater than ourselves to help us through the rough times.

From my point of view, if Jesus can overcome death, and if he meant it when he said he would help us through the difficult times in life, then what do I have to fear? What a comforting thought!

I wish you all a most blessed Easter!

"The crucifixion and subsequent resurrection of Christ was not a Mel Gibson movie."

It probably would have been more appropriate for me to post this on Good Friday, but I think it still works here on Holy Saturday. The title of this post is an approximate (and admittedly, paraphrased) quote from a sermon I heard several years ago from a wonderful priest in Texas. I've not seen Mel Gibson's movie called "The Passion of the Christ" beyond a few scenes in a theatrical trailer or in a montage on YouTube. I'm not sure I will ever see it, because I can't bring myself to do so. I understand that it is particularly violent and graphic (perhaps by necessity), and quite realistic. Honestly, it's too much for me to handle. Contemplating Jesus' death is tough enough. I'm not sure I want to see it depicted cinematically. I understand that the last scene, a symbolic prediction of Jesus' resurrection, is quite wonderful and hopeful, though.

I've not always been a religious person, and I have never been and never will be a "perfect" Catholic, but my faith has taken on a deeper meaning to me in recent years, especially after I essentially abandoned it for many years (maybe I'll discuss that in another post some time). On this, the most holy weekend for the entire Christian religion, I reflect on the sacrifice that Jesus made by dying on the cross, and on the joy and hope that comes with his resurrection. Except for when I was a kid, Easter has always been my favorite of the religious holidays. It has virtually none of the commercial trappings of Christmas (a few Easter eggs or bunnies aren't too bad when compared to the craziness known as "holiday shopping season"), but as much or more of a spiritual meaning to me.

My religion teaches that Jesus...God himself...sacrificed his life for all of humanity, and that he was miraculously resurrected "on the third day." To think that anyone would give their life for me is an amazing thing, and it's an idea that I can't even begin to comprehend. If Jesus is who he says he is (and I believe he is), then I owe him my life. Not only for what he did by dying on the cross, but for what he has done for me throughout my life. There have been many times that I should have died, based on all reason and logic. Yet I'm still here. Why? I don't know, but if Jesus and God think that I'm still worth being here, that's good enough for me. As far as the resurrection of Jesus is concerned...this is the one thing in my faith that can make my heart sing louder than at any other time. Jesus was dead, and then he came back to life! And it was all for us, so that we would not have to suffer for eternity! Absolutely awesome to me.

So why the Mel Gibson mention? It's because I hate it when people try to reduce the significance of Easter weekend to pithy arguments, bad music, or even movies that are apparently really good...sometimes for commercial reasons, and sometimes just for the sake of simplicity. The sacrifice and resurrection of Jesus is more than can possibly be depicted by any art form or debate or chocolate bunny or anything else. I'm not saying that all of these things are bad, but as with Christmas, too much of trying to "commercialize" or "simplify" the mystery is not a good thing. What I mean is this...if this is what you believe, don't just observe it at a movie theatre or in a CD player or at a lecture...live it! One of my favorite passages from the Bible is something that I wish that I (and others) would take to heart more. "This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad." This passage could not ring any truer than it does for me during this Easter weekend, and that's a great thing!